To: All Commands

Subject: Inappropriate T-Shirts
Ref: ComMidEast For Inst 16134//24 K

All commanders promulgate upon receipt

The following T-shirts are no longer to be worn on or off base by any military or civilian personnel serving in the Middle East :

1. 'Eat Pork or Die' [both English and Arabic versions]
2.. 'Shrine Busters' [Various. Show burning minarets or bomb/artillery shells impacting Islamic shrines. Some with unit logos.]
3.. 'Napalm, Sticks Like Crazy' [Both English and Arabic versions]
4.. 'Goat - it isn't just for breakfast any more.' [Both English and Arabic versions]
5.. 'The road to Paradise begins with me.' [Mostly Arabic versions, but some in English. Some show sniper scope cross-hairs.]
6.. 'Guns don't kill people. I kill people.' [Both Arabic and English versions]
7.. 'Pork. The other white meat.' [Arabic version]
8.. 'Infidel' [English, Arabic and other coalition force languages.] The above T-shirts are to be removed from Post Exchanges upon receipt of this directive.

In addition, the following signs are to be removed upon receipt of this message:

1.. 'Islamic Religious Services Will Be Held at the Firing Range at 0800 Daily.'
2.. 'Do we really need 'smart bombs' to drop on these dumb bastards?'

All commands are instructed to implement sensitivity training upon receipt.

Rules for the Military

One of my military buddies sent this to me.. It is a real hoot.. and some of it is true... :)

Marine Corps Rules:

1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.
3. Have a plan.
4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work.
5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a '4.'
7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral &diagonal preferred.)
9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.
10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.
13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Navy SEAL's Rules:

1. Look very cool in sunglasses.
2. Kill every living thing within view.
3. Adjust Speedo.
4. Check hair in mirror.

US Army Rangers Rules:

1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.
2. Locate individuals requiring killing.
3. Request permission via radio from 'Higher' to perform killing.
4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.
5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.
   

US Army Rules:

1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.
2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.
3. Curse bitterly.
4. Curse bitterly. Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.
5. Curse bitterly.

US Air Force Rules:

1. Have a cocktail.
2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.
3. See what's on HBO.
4. Ask 'What is a gunfight?'
5. Request more funding from Congress with a 'killer' Power Point presentation.
6. Wine &dine ''key' Congressmen, invite DOD &defense industry executives.
7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.
8. Declare the assets 'strategic' and never deploy them operationally.
9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.
10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption.

( And I Love This Next One)
US Navy Rules:

1. Go to Sea.
2. Drink Coffee.
3. Deploy Marines

Go Navy !

Dark Age of Camelot

A couple of co-workers and I have recently started playing an on-line MMOG (Massively multiplayer online game). I was not a big fan of spending money every month for a service. My wife was okay with spending the $14 bucks a month, if I am able to spend time with friends. Besides, it has the added benefit of keeping off of the pron… . So, we are playing a game called Dark Age of Camelot. It has a lot of potential, there is NPC, quests, different characters, different classes, and different realms. The realms are at war and at times, need some serious help defending a castle, in the battle grounds. A great place to get some XP and raise the level of your character. Each class and race have very specific abilities. I have been playing a mix of classes called a Heritic, similar a fighter mage. It is a lot of fun, but at times it get a little trying.

Last night I was in the battle grounds, for my level, and teamed up with 5 other people. We came across some Mids (another Realm) but were able to take them out easily. I began by hitting them with a few spells and then opened a can of whoopass with my trusty flail. They just kept coming back for more and more and more. I think we killed them about 5 or 6 times before I called it quits. It was just getting silly.

If you are into medieval types of games, this one is worth the 30 day trial…for free.

Great Wolf Lodge – THE BOMB!!!

This last weekend, the family went up to Washington and stayed at the Great Wolf Lodge in Grand Mound. This place is totally awesome! Water, Water, and even more Water! There are three areas for the different age groups.. However, that does not mean that the little ones can go down the big slides.. My girls loved the big slides, the big pool and the wave pool. But, they mostly played in the kiddy area, doing laps around the purple slide that stood only about 8 feet tall. They did that for hours… Which gave me time to try out a couple of the big people rides, like the one-man inter-tube and the Howlin’ Tornado. This is a four man inter-tube that kind of looks like a big funnel. You sit facing another person and you get pushed down a tube of darkness. There are only these little lights in the side of the tube that looks like you are warping into another dimension. You pop out and scream up the side of this funnel, then to the other side, then to the other side.. finally being spun and flushed out the bottom. I do have to say, that my first time on it was a bit scary and I was not sure what I got myself into. However, it was a lot of fun and want to do it again.

Here is a little trick I found. We arrive about 1pm but, check-in is not until 4pm. So, I was standing in line to for check-in and I was overhearing the staff saying to people, “Here are some passes, be back at 4.” Groovy, they asked me how many. I said 4 and off I went. They did not ask for my name or if I was checking in or anything… So, I would say that you should get their early, so you can play even longer.

The prices are similar to Disneyland, but well worth it. And with the price of fuel, it was far cheaper than trying to get to LA or even Florida.